Trying to Soothe Myself


I haven’t slept well for the last few days.  Even if I do get some sleep, I feel as though I haven’t slept a wink all night, which is nothing new.  But it’s even worse than usual.  I usually try to eat somewhat healthily.  But right now, I’m allowing myself a little bit of self-soothing through junk food.  I’m not worrying about not sleeping.  I’m just blasting music on my headphones and playing games on the computer.

I’ve been looking for pictures of my brother.  I hardly have any.  I have about 11.  Not much to show for his whole life.  I can feel sadness lurking inside me, just waiting to come out.  So far it hasn’t.  I know it will eventually.  I feel a lot of guilt.  I wish I could’ve done something for him.

Thanks for sticking by me on this journey.  Not sure where it’s gonna take me but I appreciate the company so much!  Till next time,

– Joyce.

4 responses to “Trying to Soothe Myself

  1. hugs to you…

    Like

  2. I am so grateful for your posts – and I do not feel so alone – with my BPD = I feel so alone all the time

    Like

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