Three times recently, I’ve encountered warnings about the harm that “BPDs” inflict on others. All three times the cautionary advice was offered by someone claiming to be a mental health advocate. On one occasion, the advocate described people with BPD as “manipulative” and “dangerous.” Another said it is common for BPDs to engage in abusive gaslighting (psychological manipulation and control) of those around them. The third, who works at a mental health advocacy legal group, recounted how “those people tear up our new lawyers” and other “unsuspecting” victims.
As someone who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), I’ve become inured to disparaging and demeaning comments on internet forums in which former lovers demonize ex-girlfriends and boyfriends with BPD, diagnosed or not. These former lovers are in pain so trying to cultivate compassion, while seeking validation for their own difficult experience, is just too nuanced.
However, the trend of mental health professionals callously describing people in…
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