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Blog For Mental Health 2015
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“When "I" is replaced by "We", even "illness" becomes "wellness"
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Top Ten Best BPD Sites 2016
Last weekend I had the honour of speaking for 25 minutes in front of 250 peopleabout BPDat a mental health conference. Although the months leading up to it were filled with panic and dread and I genuinely was not sure if I’d be able to go through with it, it actuallywent 100x better than I could ever have hoped for.
I have decided to share my presentation here (in a written as opposed to audio format to maintain anonymity). I trust that my readers won’t plagiarise or copyright the content, but I do want to put this out there as it is a rare achievement I felt proud of! (Some of the slides have come out in a squished format, but I think they’re clear enough).
BPD, ME AND ANXIETY
Hello everyone and thank you for introducing me. I am here to talk to you about what it’s like for…
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Here is the latest guest blog post by Patrick:
Quite often and in many ways I feel as though I am a terrible human being. Behind every good thing I say or do, lies a bad thought or intention. That is just me, that is my life with borderline personality disorder (BPD).
Life often feels like a daydream of desire and obsession. The desire is mainly to do with objectification, beauty and perfection. Sometimes I cannot stop myself treating women and some parts of them like objects of my selfish desire. Even with that, I am drawn towards people who have strong values, are emotionally intelligent, disciplined and responsible. There are always imperfections, though, and for a fat rugged man I am very superficial. That leads to my obsessions and the never ending need for validation.
The reasons for BPD are many. There are genetic and environmental influences involved. There are events that occur during childhood play a role in the disorder developing. You are not in tune with people’s emotional needs or feelings. This has led to emotional, verbal and physical abuse. Loss, neglect and bullying also contribute. Relationships with partners, friends and family are very difficult and you always feel that people are going to abandon you. We are very impulsive and are very unsure of our identity, which in turn makes me feel more inappropriate, disassociated, irritable and stressed.
I’ve been asked what are the causes of BPD? For me, there is always a feeling of overwhelming anger, fear or distress. There also fears of the consequences of our actions. This can be caused by instability at home, struggling with a personal issue or just stress in general. It can also be because of unjust abuse that you feel that you have copped, neglect that you have felt, or family grief. Knowing the difference between liking, loving and obsession helps to keep it in perspective. The big thing for me is handling what I feel is rejection (from friends, family, pets and people in general). Being nice, living well and not being overly desperate.
There are several treatments for BPD, such as dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT), cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT), mindfulness, meditation, medication, therapy, books, podcasts and support groups (online and in person). Support groups are great, but you have to be your own personal 24/7 support group too. It’s no good trying to be a mental health advocate if I’m not managing my illness, medication, diet, exercise and life in general well. I can’t rely on other people to include me, look after me, cheer me up and make me feel better. That has to come from within. It’s not just about what is going on with me. Mental health is also about my family, my friends, associates and people in the community all together. We all have stories to share, places to be and things to do. Sometimes I get too focused on myself and the things I want to do, rather than family time, work commitments and recreational activities. You need to find a balance so that you can be happier, content, easy going, relax more, be on time, less tired and overwhelmed.
With BPD, it’s so good to be able to talk to people about it, explain what it is and how to manage it. But at the same time not get too overly personal too quickly, leave something to the imagination and not tell out your life story all at once. As interesting and captivating as it maybe.
Please just know that having a mental illness is not a choice. Dealing with it and managing it is a choice. lf my family and me can survive with BPD, you can to. What is stopping you? You are not helpless; you can learn to take care of yourself and your mental illness. It is not up to people to make up for what you did not receive as a child. That is not their job, it’s up to you. You are an adult and you can be ok. Please be honest, mindful, open, truthful and understanding.
Psychosis in borderline personality disorder: How assessment and treatment differs from a psychotic disorder | Current Psychiatry
My name is Hollie and I’ve had Borderline Personality Disorder for the last 11 years. You’d never notice; I’m the woman on the tube flicking through her Filofax, the person in the queue at Sainsbury’s and even the woman standing in front of a couple of hundred students giving a lecture.
Even on my bad days when I’m talking too quickly, flirting with the Starbucks barista or buzzing with energy and unable to sit still, you’d never be able to guess I live with a disorder that kills one in ten of us via suicide.
For those who know about Borderline Personality Disorder, they’ll think they know about my personality – manipulative, needy, on edge.
And for those who don’t, the term ‘Borderline Personality Disorder’ brings ideas of schizophrenia multiple personalities, psychotic tendencies and no sense of self; it’s because of this I’m penning a piece about the ultimate misconceptions…
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My son just turned 15. His grandmother came over and he opened some presents. He got mostly what he wanted – some DVDs and some gift cards and candy.
My husband and I celebrated our 20th anniversary. We had a very quiet day. He got me a teddy bear and some chocolates. For our 25th, we’ll have to try to get away somewhere for a few days. We’ll have to start saving up for it starting now, as soon as I can actually save a few bucks. Still working on paying off my credit cards.
This blog is now four years old. I just got a notification from WordPress telling me the other day. Wow! Four years. I can tell a difference in myself from when I first started blogging. My relationship with my mother-in-law was not very good at the time. She was living with us and she didn’t understand my Borderline Personality Disorder. We had a few good talks and she understands me a lot better now. We get along great. She is just like a second mother to me. She has since remarried and moved out but we keep in touch often by phone and sometimes with visits.
I am thinking of possibly starting my BPD Group up again in May. I’ll have to think of some materials to prepare for it. I have a few ideas already. I’ll have to schedule it around my son’s tutoring, which is going well. He’s come into the hallway when she goes to the front door to put her boots on and waves to her. All she can see is his hands, then his foot. Next time, he’ll have to show her both his hands and feet. That’ll be something to see!
My sister came over on Monday for our monthly sisters day together. We had fun playing cards and goofing off on the computer. My grandson turned one year old on Monday. I haven’t heard from my daughter for a week. I hope her and my grandson are doing okay. My grandson is getting adopted. It’s probably the best thing. My daughter and her boyfriend are not ready to be parents right now. They’re couch surfing and have no money. I wish things would get better for them. But they have to reach out for help. There is help out there if you are willing to take it. I keep telling my daughter to talk to a counsellor because they can hook you up with different agencies to help you but she just won’t for some reason. She’d rather just ask my husband and I for money, which we don’t have.
Sorry for complaining but I just needed to let that all out. I thought I would update you on how my life is going right now. I’ll have some more news coming soon. Till then,
Self care is an important issue when dealing when mental health. It’s one of those things we seem to neglect some times, especially when we are in a low swing.
Here are some tips to help with self care:
1. Be sure to get some sleep: It’s hard to do when you’re having an episode of mania or when you work a crazy schedule. But your body needs sleep. It’s how you process information and your body restores systems. Try to schedule it to where you can get at least 7-8 hours of sleep a night. If you are having trouble sleeping, you may want to talk to your doctor and let them know that you aren’t getting enough sleep at night and discuss a good course of action. My doctor was kind enough to prescribe a sleep aid for me. Some times, I still don’t get enough…
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THIS → I’ve lived with Borderline Personality Disorder for years. Why I’m finally talking about my diagnosis.
Fountain House Symposium and Luncheon: Borderline Personality Disorder Why It Matters and What You Should Know. May 1, 2017 Honoree Amanda Wang Speakers John Gunderson, MD, Marie-Paule, de Valdivia, MBA, LCSW and Perry Hoffman, Ph.D. | Borderline Personality Disorder
Source: Fountain House Symposium and Luncheon: Borderline Personality Disorder Why It Matters and What You Should Know. May 1, 2017 Honoree Amanda Wang Speakers John Gunderson, MD, Marie-Paule, de Valdivia, MBA, LCSW and Perry Hoffman, Ph.D. | Borderline Personality Disorder