Tag: my brother
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First “Angelversary” for my Brother
On Tuesday, it was exactly one year ago that my brother passed away. For some reason, I keep feeling angry when I think about it. I’m trying to work through my feelings the best that I can. I’m angry that he left us too soon. I’m angry that he didn’t have to leave us. I’m…
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New Flowers for My Brother
On the 26th of this month, it’ll be exactly one year since my brother passed away. On Sunday, I went with my parents and sister to his grave and put some new flowers on it. There is also a cross that glows in the dark. My sister thought that would be a nice touch. I…
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Running Two Groups In One Day Tomorrow!
Tomorrow morning, I will be picked up to do an out-of-town BPD Group. Then, after lunch, I will be running another out-of-town group! I’ve never done two groups in one day before. I’m so nervous but excited! I’ve put a Calendar of Events in my newsletter I’ve started, with the dates of where and when…
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A Goodbye Dream
The other night, I dreamed that I was crying and telling my brother that I never got a chance to say goodbye to him. I now know why I dreamed that. It’s because I never got a chance to say goodbye to the people at my out-of-town BPD group either. I never got a chance…
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A Strange Dream About My Brother
I just woke up from a strange dream. I was in bed and my brother came to me and said that he was sorry he spent my change and that my friend’s mother had to drive us home. Then he turned into my son when he was little, and scampered away in his pajamas. What…
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Mixed Emotions Re: My Family’s Reactions to My Brother’s Suicide and My Tribute to Him
*** TRIGGER WARNING! SUICIDE! *** My family doesn’t want to talk about my brother’s death being a suicide. I’d like to talk about it, busting stigma, and therefore, feeling like I’m doing something good that will come out of it, thereby easing my guilt and sadness. Since they don’t want to talk about it, I can’t do…
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A Theory Re: My Not Crying for my Brother
I have a theory about why I haven’t cried over my brother’s death yet. It goes something like this: If I allow myself to feel upset over his death, that will put me in touch with all of the guilt that I feel regarding my not seeing him as often before he died, and not…
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A Bad Dream and an Early Visit
The other night I dreamed about my brother. I don’t remember the actual dream. All I know is that the dream was about my brother and that I woke up feeling very stressed out and upset. I’m sure it’s because he’s been on my mind so much for the last month or so. He was…
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One Month Anniversary of My Brother’s Death Today
It’s been one month today since my brother passed away. I still haven’t cried for him. I feel a little guilty for not crying. I feel kind of like a bad sister. I’m hoping that, through my tribute, I can be a better sister and make up for not being there for him when he…
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After My Brother’s Service
My wi-fi has been out for nearly a week. I couldn’t keep up with my blogging and e-mail. I was getting so frustrated! We just got a new cable for it and it’s working now. I hope it keeps working! On Saturday, I attended my brother’s graveside service. There were quite a few people there. …
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