Helping those with Borderline Personality Disorder fight the stigma and enjoy their lives for who they are – highly empathetic, compassionate and creative people with beautiful minds.
Borderline personality disorder affects about 1.6 percent of adults in the U.S.; brain imaging studies show structural abnormalities impacting the limbic system.
I had my Anxiety and Panic Group today. The facilitator had a bunch of handouts with all kinds of symptoms of anxiety. Here are some associated with Depersonalization, a common symptom of BPD when under extreme stress:
I’ve seen a lot of people asking on Facebook what the differences are between Borderline Personality Disorder and Bipolar Disorder. Although they seem very similar, they are totally different disorders. It is possible to have both disorders, making a correct diagnosis even more difficult. Here are some helpful links:
What do you think of this site and my blog? What about links to this site on FaceBook, etc? Is there anything that you especially like or would like to see more of? Are there any blog posts or articles which particularly spoke to you?
Am I making a difference to anyone out there? Letting you know that you’re not alone, and that others experience the same things that you do? Are there any thought-provoking items? Any things that you’ve found on this site that you haven’t found anywhere else?
I run this site for myself as well, for my own mental well-being. I am hoping to not feel so alone as well. I have received a few comments, but am always curious as to what others think. What are your experiences with Borderline Personality Disorder? Do you encounter stigma? Or do you keep your diagnosis to yourself? Are others understanding of it, or do they have misconceptions about it? Do you get any validation of your feelings, or are you totally invalidated by everyone, all the time? Do you do anything to try to raise awareness and reduce the stigma of BPD? What symptoms do you have (if you are comfortable sharing them)? Have you had any success?
Where are you in your journey to recovery? Have you just been diagnosed and are beginning your journey? Or are you now in recovery and have some advice for people who are just beginning theirs?
Last Tuesday, I met with my counsellor and my mother-in-law to try to help her understand my BPD. We had a very good talk and I think she’s finally beginning to understand it a bit more. I tried to explain to her how she was unintentionally invalidating me constantly. She told me that she wasn’t saying anything bad to me. I explained to her that it doesn’t matter what she says or how she says it, that to someone with BPD, especially with me, it always feels like criticising and that I’m not good enough. She asked what she could do to make it better and I told her “nothing. Just do your own thing. You can’t make this go away. I’m the only one who can help me.” She got a look on her face like she finally “got it.” Also kind of sad for me.
My counsellor thought that I was very articulate, and told my mother-in-law that I’m doing everything I need to be doing to keep myself as well as I can be. I’m seeing both of them again this Tuesday. It’s good practice for me for running a group or presentation on BPD to educate people on the disorder. I’m learning more about myself every day.
I was so exhausted afterwards that I had to lay down for an hour. People don’t realize how exhausting it is for those of us with BPD just managing our emotions every day. It just comes to them naturally.
I’ll keep you posted on how it goes Tuesday. Till then,
I have been trying to explain my BPD to my mother-in-law for months. At first, she had no idea what I was talking about. But she gets a little bit more out of every conversation we have. It’s such a complex disorder to try to explain to someone who doesn’t have it. I believe they can only understand it to a point. They don’t have to live with it every day of their lives. They can only try to imagine what it must be like. At least with depression or Bipolar, you can feel better, with either time or medication or therapy or a combination of them, and the symptoms go away. With BPD, it never goes away. You can learn how to manage the symptoms, your emotions and behaviour, but it’s always going to be there, for the rest of your life. It’s absolutely exhausting! People expect too much of you. They think that, if only you’d try a little harder. They’re seeing things through their own eyes, not ours. They don’t have our brains. They think that, if you were trying as hard as you possibly can, you’d be handling things just like them, and you’d be doing so much better. They don’t realize that, you’re doing the best that you can. You’re never going to be like them. That doesn’t mean that you’re any worse than them. It just means that since your brain works differently, and they have to realize that.
When people expect too much of you, its extremely invalidating. What they need to do is validate us by saying “I don’t understand exactly how you feel, but I know that you’re doing the best you can.” This will make us feel validated and then we can get better, at our own pace. When they push us to do things that we are not capable of, that just makes us feel worse instead of better. With me, I feel very overwhelmed and paralyzed and I can’t think straight or do anything. Then they get upset with me for not doing anything, which makes me feel even worse. I feel so many things so intensely, all at the same time – anger, guilt, etc. “I’m not good enough.” I just goes into a vicious circle of negative emotions. Every time I try to explain it to my mother-in-law, she says “Oh, that must be awful!” And it is. Sure, sometimes it can be a good thing, but it’s also extremely difficult to live with.
What are your experiences with trying to explain your BPD to others? Have you had any success or not? If so, what do you find helpful? I’ve included some helpful links at the end of this post.
Comments
What do you think of this site and my blog? What about links to this site on FaceBook, etc? Is there anything that you especially like or would like to see more of? Are there any blog posts or articles which particularly spoke to you?
Am I making a difference to anyone out there? Letting you know that you’re not alone, and that others experience the same things that you do? Are there any thought-provoking items? Any things that you’ve found on this site that you haven’t found anywhere else?
I run this site for myself as well, for my own mental well-being. I am hoping to not feel so alone as well. I have received a few comments, but am always curious as to what others think. What are your experiences with Borderline Personality Disorder? Do you encounter stigma? Or do you keep your diagnosis to yourself? Are others understanding of it, or do they have misconceptions about it? Do you get any validation of your feelings, or are you totally invalidated by everyone, all the time? Do you do anything to try to raise awareness and reduce the stigma of BPD? What symptoms do you have (if you are comfortable sharing them)? Have you had any success?
Where are you in your journey to recovery? Have you just been diagnosed and are beginning your journey? Or are you now in recovery and have some advice for people who are just beginning theirs?
I look forward to hearing any comments.
Joyce.
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Posted in Editorials
Tagged awareness, comments, Interpersonal relationships, misconceptions, stigma, symptoms, Validation